Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Bocas del Tora to Dallas in 48 hours

Bocas to Dallas

Synopsis

I have a huge amount of luggage, many transfer points a small amount of cash, no credit cards or debit cards. This is a really bad trip.


12/2117:15Leaveapartment
12/2118:00Leave BMT water taxi
12/2119:00Leave Almirante
12/2205:00Arrive Panama
12/2206:00Arrive at Airport
12/2214:30Leave for Miami
12/2217:30Arrive Miami
12/2218:20Finished Getting Sodomized by Custom
12/2219:30Get a rescheduled flight
12/2220:40Miss Rescheduled Flight
12/2222:30New Reschedule
12/2309:30Shuttle to airport
12/2312:20Depart for Dallas
12/2314:40Arrive in Dallas
12/2315:45Search for Son and Bags End
12/2316:30Arrive at Christies

12/21

17:00

My landlord called a taxi for me and I two duffle bags and two suitcases and put them in the bed of the truck. I dont know why these guys drive 22 MPG trucks, cruise all day and take fares. We hadn't gone 30 feet when he stopped to pick a nady and here teenage daughter.

I asked her if she was coming to Dallas with me and she just gave me a big grin and said “Yeah”. The driver asked if this was a Christmas treat for my son. Hell no, he get plenty by himself.

I showed up at BMT, the water taxi company and the bags were placed on a little boat, that was full. The luggage jammed against legs and he took off like a bat out hell. The pounding my back was getting was only marginally offset by the effects it had on young mother sitting next to me. She had a cushion, I was sitting on a hard wood seat. She kept stealing glance after a particularly bad bounce. I was stealing glances when they were less painful. After half an hour of this. We got to the docks and I hoisted out four 60 pound plus bags. I know this but we'll get to that later. This kid was around 17 and couldn't have weighed more than 140 pound. He picked two bags, another guys threw on a third and the kid took running laughing upp a flight of stairs. I took my back and the remaining rolling suitcase and strolled up the ramp.

17:00

The taxi ride to the bus stop was about 5 minutes. Then I transferred them all to a spot on the sidewalk. The guy loading them on the bus grunted with each bag and handed me four checks. Checkin was a hand printed list of names for whom tickets were sold I pointed to mine, she checked off when I showed her my ticket.

Now for the posturing, I grabbed the second seat scooted over a little toward the aisle, swung my fanny toward the aisle, put my back in front of the aisle seat put back my head and closed my eyes. If the bus wasn't sold out I should be ok. After the bus took I looked around and there were 2 empty seats. There were several really hot woman that it would have been nice to share a seat with.

This whole boarding process could not have taken more than 10 minutes.

Some inscrutable about some guy who turns himself into a robot and flies around played. All spanish dialog with Spanish subtitle. The Panamanian in front was wearing a knit cap and a jacket. I had my air on full.

We stopped around 8 for food every body ran out. I just had an apple and a bottle of water. Then we droned on, mile and mile. Its about 250 miles and its a 10 hour trip. The just jammed into the small of my back. And we droned and people snored. About midnight we stopped at a gas station and the driver performed some mysterious operation to the engine with dishwashing soap. Maybe was checking for leaks. No food or water to be seen. I was beginning to regret not having bought more water. And the bus droned inexorably east.

About 1 in the morning we stopped another chinese cafeteria that caters to buses and stocked.

I read half the jungle to a flashlight I carry in my back. Most everybody was sleeping.

05:00

About 5 in the morning we got to the bus station in Panama City. Within a minute a guy was asking me if I wanted a taxi to the airport. Sure lets go. I was just going take two bags and backpack and let him carry the other two. He insisted we needed a cart. Well it was a long treck. One in the trunk three in the back seat. My backpack on my lap and off we go. Now I'm seeing the landscape from last half hour played backwards. Half the people on the bus were going to the airport. Couldn't they have made a stop on the way in?

Then there was some weirdness, I gave the driver the nominal $20 he said it was $30 and took $10 from the baggage guy. Then he wallked maybe 3O feet and put the bags down my the ticket counter. I gave $3, he said it is a dollar a bag and had 5 bags, then told me I owed him the 10 bucks he loaned me.

There were 30 people in line ahead of me and the ticket clerks weren't there yet. Finally they showed and the line started to move really slow. There is a $50 overweight for bags that weight over fifty pounds. They put the bag on the scale, be informed of this and then start rearranging their luggage.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Too much stuff

So much to do. My pool table, jet skis and ATVs, that 18' 5000 pound rated dual axle trailer the DR mower,brush hog.

Southlake

Southlake will be so glad to be rid of me. How many parties had the cops and the fire department? Oh yeah the ambulance. That's when I was there. When the boys had the run of the place? Guess I'll never know but I've heard reports of 15 visits a week.

Nearly stranded

Bought the last seat on tomorrow's bus to Panama. Adios Bocas. How long can I stay in San Blas after I get back? No internet, no electricity no animals, no plumbing. It's Gilligan's Island without Mary Anne. Then the south to the Pacific. Wish Pat would teach me the ropes.

I thought it was locked up.

Gotta pack where are the binocs? Oh shit I left them in the Casa Verde office. It's closed locked where are my lock picks? Two deadbolts and locking handset 42 seconds.

Wrong guy

he: Can I tell you something interesting about the bible?
me: Patrick, you chose the wrong guy I know it better than you ever will and I know it is bullshit,
Patrick: How do know my name?
me: I'm the son of Satan. No, really you are the only son of that woman standing across the street and you are Irish.
Patrick: How do you know that?
me: I am Satan. I lied but the devil does shit like that. You are kidding, right? It's obvious she dotes on you her eyes don't waver, should I believe this god fearing woman left a sibling to fend for himself? She is a kind and gentle person. Her stature says that. And look at you. Could you be more Irish? Where are you from Wisconsin or Minnesota? You got here yesterday right? BMT or Taxi 25?

By this time the kid was freaked. Just observations and deductions.

I could tell by the clothes they did not fly in and there are only two water taxis to the main land so, how could I be wrong?

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

May I Slap Your Mamma?

Your ass is perfect
Your breasts sublime
But yo mama, she one loud bitch.

Friday, December 11, 2009

They came in through the kitchen window

I woke up, took a shower and decided that I'd go out for a cuppa joe. After a month of living in Panama I feel no need to change my attire daily. I wear the same pair of underwear every day. Wicking polyester with spandex; compression shorts. I wash them in the bathroom sink and wring them out in a towel and they are good to go in the morning.

A quick pat on my now not so firm right ass cheek. AaaahShit, where is the wallet? Sometimes I pull it out at night to look up a hint for a web site password or to buy things on-line. After dinner at Kun Ha's, with Walter and Stephen I surfed the web a little, replied to some emails and I went to bed, that was what, maybe 11?

Not on the desk, not on the kitchen counter. Where is my notebook computer? I was using it right here on the kitchen table last night. Yup here is the cat5 cable. Oh shit. The camera, the other notebook. Fuck somebody took my wallet out of my pants that were on the foot of the bed while I slept there. Front door is locked, worthless barrel bolt in place.

The window in the kitchen is not latched. The moulding is missing. Mutha Fuka stripped the mullion and popped the latch, then stole me computers and camera. Left lots of valuable stuff, but came into the room in which I was sleeping and took my wallet. Ballsy bastard

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

He came in through the kitchen window.

I woke, got out of bed, dragged a comb across my head.

Need coffee. I patted my right cheek. WTF? Maybe I left it next to the computer; where's the computer... where's my camera? Oh shit.

I was robbed a burglar pried the moulding off the kitchen window, sprung the latch stole the electronics from the kitchen counter top and then came in my bedroom and took the wallet out of my pants lying on the chair at the foot of my bed while I slept there.

Long day, filing complaint with police, inquiring with the nefarious characters in town.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Smithsonian Institute

Smithsonian Institute


I headed out with my newly repaired camera with the intent of checking it out at the Smithsonian Institution. It had been raining on and off all the previous night and all morning, so I packed a big zip lock bag for my camera. I started my trek around 2:40 and it quickly became apparent that I wasn't going to get there by 3:00 so I hailed a cab and arrived at 2:55. It was hot and muggy as I waited for the tour to begin. At 3:05 I asked the guard if I was to go in the building my self, where was this tour? He made a phone call and I waited.

I went out front and took a picture of the plaque, the english text of which follows:

Plaque content

The Smithsonian Institute was founded in Washington, DC in 1846 after a british scientist, James Smithson, left an inheritance "...to the United States of America to found at Washington, an establishment for increase and diffusion of knowledge among men." Since then the museum has grow to include 19 museums, 9 research centers and the National Zoological Park located in Washington. D.C.

A part of the Smithsonian Institute, the Smithsonian Tropical Research Institute was born when Barro Colorado Island in the Panama Canal became a research site in 1923. Since then it has grown to include 9 sites in Panama. They provide leading researchers access to tropical forests, reefs, mangroves and island ecosystems.

The Bocas del Toro Research Station was founded in 1998, an ideal platform for both marine and terrestrial research. The station hosts yearly scientists and students from over 34 countries, as well as local students who take part in the school outreach program.

Size of site: 6 hectares
Laboratory building inaugurated in 2003.
The build in environmentally friendly with solar panel roof, rainwater collector and natural lighting.


More time was killed by walking around the front area taking pictures.

At 3:10 my guide showed up and we proceeded to walk down the path where he pointed out mimosa pudica a
plant that folds up its leaves when disturbed. It happens amazingly quickly considering that it is a plant, less than a second. I'm guessing a grazing animal disturbing it would cause it to "shrivel up" and appear much less lush.

Panama has three types of sloths, the two toed, the three toed and the pygmy three towed.
There are eight known three toed and two two toed sloths in the park. As it is fenced off and there are no trees near the fences that reach adjacent property, the prospects for the two toed seem a bit dicey and the pygmy is not likely to materialize.

Interesting information on sloths.

We observed a few birds, notably ...

Then we went inside the research facility, took several glasses of chilled water and I was pointed to the "donations jar". It said that $5 would bring a class full of kids to the center. I got the hint and deposited a $5 into the jar, tripling the value of its contents.

Out the back door were endless shelves that last year held 250 terrariums for a research project on the oophaga pumilio frog. This frog is known by a great many names based on the color and location. The research was an attempt to figure out why there were so many color variations.

At this point I was told several things that contradict information I have read elsewhere including:

Poisonous specimens come in the following colors:
  • Red, with blue feet and a spot on the back
  • Green with yellow belly and spots on the back
  • Blue with black spots on the back.
and that others are far less poisonous. I've been told that the effect handling the frogs and touching the lips is a temporary numbness. It is my understanding the original source of the frogs poison is the alkoloids from plants; the frogs feed on insects which feed on these plants. The frogs of different colors are in different locales, but I don't know that the plant diversity is that great on neighboring islands. I was told that
  • Green with black spots from Bocas Island (Isla Colon)
  • Red comes from Isla Solarte
  • Bastimentos has a huge variety of colors including
    pink, yellow, white, purple, yellow with white
Bastimentos is famous for its red frogs and one of the most popular destinations in Bocas is Red Frog beach. One of the curators came to tell us that he had spotted a 3 toed sloth with an infant so we went off to photograph it. I'd never seen an infant sloth before. As we returned to continue our path 4 Northern Jacana crossed the path, two adults and two juveniles. The guide told me that the smaller adult was the male and that the male protected the young. Sure enough as we continued down the trail pappa and the two juveniles skittered one way and mamma went off on her own, but still watching them with interest. We wandered the trails looking for sloths and monkeys; there is a small troop of howler monkeys in the confines, but didn't see anything. A small snake scurried across the path and was identified as a "road snake". I've never heard of such a thing and can't find any reference on the web. A small enclosure marked "Bat Home" sat empty in the jungle. The enclosure had been completed for months before and was to be used by a group from the University of Wisconsin in the forthcoming months. Hmmm, it's snowing in Wisconsin now. How did this timing come about? A quick walk to the dock followed a discussion on identification of the various types of Mangrove, all of which were growing within 4 meters of the sign describing their characteristics. Mangroves are the filters of the tropics, but people don't like them as the block the water view from shore and they harbor chitras, tiny biting fleas. That concluded the trip. I was told by the guide that he had 4 other tours of the facility, I'm not sure how this is possible.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Motorcycling in Panama

I was thinking of buying a motorcycle and touring Panama, but I don't think I'll shoot to cross the Darien Gap.

http://www.motivation-tools.com/adventures/darien_gap.htm

Monday, November 30, 2009

Roberto

Conflict in the street..

Roberto rode by on his bike. He was still displeased with the fact that I told two Canadians on Thanksgiving to keep their hands on their wallets while talking with Roberto.

Yeah, right in front of Roberto. I'm a pretty straight up guy.

Roberto: Fuck you Jim.

Roberto thou art..

"A knave, a rascal, an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action-taking knave; a whoreson, glass-gazing, super-serviceable, finical rouge; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd, in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch: one whom I will beat into clamorous whining if thou deniest the least syllable of thy addition."

I'm sure he is not a student of Shakespeare but he understood that I had nothing but contempt for him.

Then I went to lunch. On the way back he waved the finger at me while holding a beer and riding his bike. I took three quick steps to his side of the street and he smashed into the back of a gasoline truck while trying to avoid me.

Camera Repair

Yo: Por favor avise mr. Gómez, que el dinero fue transferido a través de Western Union ocho uno seis cero cuatro cero uno ...

Ella: Sr. Jim de la cámara estará lista en wed nez dee.

Wednesday? Awesome. Back in the photography game.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Visitor

The big guy from Minnesota had a visitor last night. At 3:15 somebody came through the kitchen window tangled his foot in the curtains, fell to the floor and fled back out the window.

I told him this was just something to write home about and it beats being in Minnesota in "almost December". He agreed.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

What are these vegetables?

Dumb Ass: What are those vegetables?
Me: Chilis
Dumb Ass: What?
Me: Peppers
Dumb Ass: I love peppers. (Pops a few in mouth and bites)
Me: Those are habanero peppers. Panama is known to grow the hottest in the world.
Dumb Ass: (&%#@#$( (&U#@^^ !@#!@#

Sorry, stupid piece of shit

An associate of a friend of mine picked up a whore and took her to his place.

Sixty years old, white haired, fat, deaf as a stump.

Hmmm. She slipped him a mickie and 12 hours later he woke up with....

Nothing

Cell phone, wallet, $4,000 cash (extra credit dumbass points for that) and the rest of his eight ball... gone.

What the hell? How stupid can you be?

Thursday, November 26, 2009

The Religious

response to Facebook friend request

Between Niece's Facebook Friend and You
me November 26 at 12:28pm
Do I know you?
Niece's Facebook Friend November 26 at 1:11pm
opps sorry focused on the last name. mixed up on the first.
me November 26 at 1:14pm
no problem, I've friended you. Defriend if you want, I will take no offense. I'm Kat's crazy uncle.
Niece's Facebook Friend November 26 at 1:16pm
i was mixed up, thought at first you were kats dad chuck.
me November 26 at 1:25pm
It is a far better thing that you know me not.
When I read:

May those that love us love us, And for those that don't love us,
May god turn their hearts,
And if he can't turn their hearts May he turn their ankles.
So we will know them by their limping
.

it sent shivers down my spine. I am a very tolerant person. People can have crazy beliefs, but if you pray for my death or mutilation, then you are sociopathic and I don't hang with sociopaths.
Niece's Facebook Friend November 26 at 1:31pm
Fair enough, its just part of being Irish.
Niece's Facebook Friend November 26 at 1:32pm
Not so much mutilation as a spranged ankle though.
Niece's Facebook Friend November 26 at 1:33pm
Sprained

The Trash Box

One thing the Panamanians have down is they put their trash in metal boxes or grill fronted concrete enclosures. In Costa Rica the trash is put in wooden boxes with no top or an open front and animals come in and scatter the trash or take whole bags and tear them apart somewhere within a hundred meters.

The box in front of my apartment had deteriorated to the point that it need to be replaced.

Supplies
  • 1 4' x 8' sheet of expanded steel
  • 40' or so of 1/2 tubular 8 gauge steel tubing.

Tools:
  • Hacksaw
  • Arc Welder DW402-B3 120V AC
  • Cutoff Grinder Dewalt DW402-B3 absent blade guard.
The goal
  • Create 1 2' x 4' replacement panel framed with two intermediate rails on 1' centers.

My estimate?
  • One person
  • Measure and cut steel tubing 20 minutes.
  • Cut expanded steel 10 minutes.
  • welding, 10 - 20 minutes.

Five guys have been working on this since 10:00.

One works, four watch.

I was listening to the guy cutting expanded steel. Expanded steel looks like It is made buy punching slits in sheet steel and then pulling on the ends. After half an hour I had to go outside and see what the hell they were doing. Mr. Panama had the expanded steel 1/2" off the ground on top of the cut steel tubing and was cutting the steel at the end points of the diamonds. As soon as I walked out of my apartment, the sound told me what was wrong.

A grinder emits a free spinning sound and a loaded sounded from the motor and a sound from the abrasives acting on the material being ground. A loaded sound and the fact that concrete dust was filling the air was my subtle clue that the bonehead with the tool was unqualified for the job.


Upon visual inspection... Yup sure enough the guy was cutting a 1/2 groove in the concrete while cutting the steel. I had them raise the whole frame onto cinder blocks and he finished the remaining 3/4's of the work in two minutes and saved a cutoff wheel in the process. Those wheels are $5 - $6 in the US, so probably $10-15 down here, a days wages.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Jurassic Park

A walk in the jungle seemed like an appropriate activity on a warm partly overcast day. I couldn't get any charters to Salt Creek so I thought I'd walk from Bastimentos Town to Red Frog. Janpan indicated they would take me and then dispatched a girl to go find the "Captain". Ten minutes later the supervisor at Janpan was communicating with the girl who was two blocks away via hand signals in the street. I gave her a shrug and walked away.

There are a lot of water taxis here. A street hustler saw me walking toward the boat taxi area and asked me where I wanted to go. They get 10% for securing business so he just earned himself 30 cents, except for the fact that they had no other passengers to Bastimentos, so I would have to pay $5. Fine, I'll pay $5. We were third in queue to get out of the docks, there were two other boats in our "lane" that had to leave first. Then we went 30 feet and the captain yelled out something in Spanish and two other passengers appeared, and elderly black woman and a middle aged eastern european looking man with two back packs. WTF? I thought there were no other passengers.

We arrived at the "Central Park" a dock in about the middle of town. I gave the pilot $3, he insisted on $5 and feigned any lack of comprehension that he under stood "dos hombres, uno damas, no solo". Fuckstick, I gave him $5.

The short climb up the stairs found me in front of a galvanized metal front grocery store. I had no doubt it was run by a Chinese family. The only "road" in town is a two meter wide concrete sidewalk that parallels the shore. I turned right and headed toward Red Frog Beach. The inhabitants were all antillean blacks, not an Indian or mestizo in sight. This was clearly a lower class to lower middle class residential neighborhood. Colorful flowers were in abundance but I had the distinct impression that the were planted long ago and left to fend for themselves.

A little hotel had a dirt filled cayuga (dugout canoe) out front supported by two blocks near the ends. The middle was broken and rested on the ground. The flowers planted in the dirt disregarded the neglect and flourished.

Palm trees dotted the shores on the far side of the houses. The path veered and climbed off to the left, away from the bay and then up and to the right to a cemetery. Concrete above ground vaults half covered with tile formed the only burying style that I observed. I walked to the far end of the cemetery and observed a trail. Two seven or eight year old boys scurried about with no obvious destination. They informed me that I was indeed on the trail to Red Frog Beach and that they would show me the way for "ten dollah".

Across the way was a fence that looked like an flaural cycle fence, woven from sticks like a course basket. The trail was muddy and trash of all sort was everywhere as though somewhen had brought up large bags of trash and dumped them. The trail was very narrow, less than a foot wide and at a minimum muddy. I stomped on the ground as I walked to scare away any of the ground dwelling vipers that frequent this part of the world and watched my hands to ensure I didn't disturb their arboreal kin. Digging my heels in while descending slopes made this part of the walk akin to really bad skiing. This went on for a while and 25 minutes into my hike there was a manicured hill that had obviously been well grazed and the trail become level and very walkable and couple of meters wide.

I encountered the cayuga cemetery. A steel sided house on stilts had five or size cayugas that looked more akin to flower bedding material than maritime equipment. Fiddler crabs and hermit crabs scuttered about but there were no insects of any sort. At the 45 minute mark more swamps and bridges made of chain sawed sections of log on other logs stretched far into the distance and around a corner. I spent 20 minutes walking on the break wall as there was no shore.

An Indian came down the path. I asked him how much farther it was to Red Frog. Lots of gesturing and incomprehensible animated Spanish later I came to the realization that he was telling me it was on the other side of the island. This was not a revelation as I had been there and travelled like cattle in the their transport trucks over the island.

He indicate that he had an amigo who could transport me in his panga. Then he ran up the hill and was never seen again. I proceeded down the trail and one hour and twenty minutes into the trek encountered a house on stilts in the water with the land surrounded by barbed wire and a no trespassing sign. No way forward and a miserable trek back. A mestizo came out of the boat house "Necessito panga Bocas Town por vavor" I yelled out to him. He came out an I ascertained that he had determined that i needed a boat ride back to the main island. He indicated I should wait and 10 minutes later signalled me to come in. I don't know what they were doing in the mean time, but there was a lot of commotion in the boat house. I took the ride back to the real estate company in Bocas.

I had mud up to my knees and my shirt was wet with sweat.

Not Building off the Grid

Stephen now reports that the Canuks feel that the 10 laborers (who work for $10/day) worked too hard for the last two days and that there will be an additional charge of $1,200.

That raises the question...

Two hundred dollars in labor gets a surcharge of $1,200 for extra effort?

So Stephen is cancelling the contract, which is null and void as it is written in English and no Panamanian court will touch it.

So, three days into a 35 day project it is stopped. This is BANANA COUNTRY.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Building off the Grid

I came back from breakfast to see Stephen in front of his house with a wood delivery, about 10 sheets of 3/4" plywood ripped into 12" strips. These were to be used as concrete forms for his house off the grid. I helped him carry them through his house and load them onto his panga. He was going to take the boat over to his property where the process of creating piers for his house began this week. Although I intended to go with him, he informed me that he was returning with 10 workers and their tools in the same boat so I declined.

Stephen also had about 3 yards of gravel and 3 yards of sand in front of his house. He paid $50 for the 3 yards of sand and $150 for the three yards of grave. How is sand so cheap? Sad to say, I think it was poached off this island, Isla Colon. He found four turtle eggs in the sand. So much for conservation.

Pablo, a local laborer shovelled gravel into plastic woven bags and loaded about 1,700 pounds of gravel onto Steven's other panga, at the real estate office. Pablo came into the office as I was visiting Walter. We negotiated a day of tarpon fishing for $25 plus the gas. I said "when do you want to go?" Walter asked Pablo to show us his wallet, which proved to be empty. I guessed that tomorrow would be fine. Walter said, "but..... we are in BANANA COUNTRY." We agreed that I would go with Pablo to Stephen's at 1:00.

We headed out for lunch driving his little van the 300 yards to the restaurant. Walter loves touring in that thing. The shortest trip is via van with a side trip down every road in town at 5 miles and hour, waving to everybody and calling the girls over.




We stopped at some random location. "What the hell are we doing here?" "Pay attention, it is a little trick." Then we walked between two houses and entered the restaurant through the back door and the kitchen. Walter said "Now we are family, not customers." Sure, Walter, the obnoxious brothers.

We waited by the boat at the ferry landing. An old man came by and dropped his trousers to his knees and attempted to urinate while holding his machete. He dropped the machete about 3 times and picked it up. Then he started to shit on the beach and on his pants as he hadn't squatted far enough all the while struggling with his machete. Twenty minutes later the ordeal was over and he waddled away.

At 2:00 it started to rain and we gave up and I came back and wrote this.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Telefoto

I called Telefoto in Panama, Jose dropped off the camera today.

Maguelo told me that he will email me on Wednesday with a a diagnosis.

We shall see. Most of the conversation was done via translate.google.com so...

...and It is Banana Country.

Banana Country is not meant to be disparaging, it is a term I learned from a local, describing the fact that in Banana Country things work differently than in... oh hell, first world countries.

Juan Salazar-Bogdanovich

Juan Salazar, aka Juan Salazar-Bogdanovich aka "Wharf Rat" turned out to be a thieving little street hustler.

The money he borrowed from me "overnight" has not been returned a week later.

Mike reports that Juan is staying at Casa Verde for free and steals other peoples food from the refrigerator at the hostel.

He is known around Bocas Town as the "Wharf Rat".

As far as nature tours go, he coudn't spot a bird that wasn't in a cage and if you point it out he doesn't know what kind it is.

Lock up your shit and buy your Panamanian tours elsewhere.

Update

As 11/24 he repaid his loan, two weeks late, and I returned the possessions of his that I confiscated as collateral.

Jose

I called Jose, he hadn't replied to a half a dozen emails over the course of 3 days.

He told me that he had picked up the camera and delivered to Telefoto in Panama City.

Reply to your email, Mr. Banana Man

I called Jose. He told me he picked up the camera and delivered it to Telefoto in Panama City.

Ummm, Jose, Could you just have replied to one of my half dozen emails?

Telefoto doesn't respond to emails either.

I need a gun permit. Where's Juan? He needs a machete up his ass.

It's different in banana country

Examples:

Septic Tanks

A ditch digger, working a pick axe takes off his shoes while standing on sharp volcanic rock. The feet will heal, the shoes have to be repaired.

Camera Repair

The people who run the pharmacy that nominally open at 8:30 show up at 8:45 then putz around inside for 15 minutes while people are waiting at the front door.

MailBoxes etc. doesn't carry boxes, or packing materials or tape, But they want $45 USD to send a letter to the US.

A taxi ride to the airport is $.50. They deliver the package for $4.00 in 1 1/2 hours to Panama City, 240 miles from here.

Cost to estimate repair cost is $36.50, in the U.S. it is $200. Stated time to make such an estimate? Here 3-5 days in the U.S. 4 to 6 weeks.

Recipient never picks up the camera.

I shipped it to hell.

Boat Move

Three guys move a 2,000 pound boat up a hill by rolling it on 50 mm iron pipes. (Where's my camera?)

Units of Measure

The currency is USD. Meat is sold by the pound. Plumbing diameters are in millimeters.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Around Panama

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Lawyers Guns and Money

Chester the investor came into town last night. He owns the company for which Walter works. Having made a considerable amount of money in Destin Florida, speculating in Real Estate and running a large restaurant he invested heavily in Bocas del Toro. He bought 130 acres of prime real estate on Isla de Bostimentos, disparagingly referred to as "Jurassic Park" by the residents of Bocas Town. The island has no infrastructure; there are no roads, no electricity, and no fresh water. It does however have pristine jungle teeming with wildlife and spectacular white sandy beaches on crystal clear water.

A young lawyer from Panama City and three of his friends came into town last night and rented a home that Chester has outside of Bocas Town over the water. They rounded up a full complement of women from the Peace Corp at a local bar and invited them to go with us on a boat tour the next day. We drove the shore of Isla de Cristobol.

Start with dickhead and the boat story.

The lots I saw on Cristobol were small and water front, ending in mud and mangrove. The land was flat and every lot I saw but one had at least an inch of water over 80% or more of the lot. You could bring in fill dirt, but your neighbors land was still a swamp. John (last name withheld), a retired pilot out of Destin, FL was an investor in this land. There were two houses, John's a very nice $400K structure built from ??? wood, with granite counter tops in the kitchen and built in dressers in each of the bedrooms. Cristobel is supposed swarming with ??? fleas.

We drove to Salt Creek Where Chester has a ???? in the water in front of a two acre lot. At the back of the lot is a cabina inhabited by the caretaker and his wife, the chef. Chester rents the place out for $150 a night. For this you get delivered to the house via boat from Bocas Town. The food has been purchased in advanced and delivered in a cooler and ??? comes out and cooks for you. What is there to do? Not a lot, other than enjoy the scenery from the back deck. If you bring a cell phone that works out there you could catch a water taxi to one of the surrounding islands. The beach is clean sand. The water is warm and clear, a warm breeze keeps everything near perfect.

We headed back to town showered and headed back to the house the lawyers were renting. Chester cooked a dinner of curried rice, lobster and jack fish and just hung out until midnight.

Saturday, November 7, 2009
I made a bunch of phone calls and emails regarding the sale and rental to my house. I thought I'd head out to Salt Creek for some nature photography, something I have not done much of in Bocas. One guy wanted to charge me $60 to go out there as it was just me. I would rather go with a tour, not only because it is cheaper but you get to meet new people. One guy in town told me he had a tour going in 15 minutes and he would take me out there and back for $10. The he sai8 he had a tour to red frog beach, coral cay and hospital point that I could go on for $5 more. The crew for this ride had no women. Two guys, late 30's or early 40's and 2 guys from California. They reeked of money, from their shoes to their shades. One had an Aston Martin hat I asked him if he owned one, he said he had a 2008 ????. We went to a marina to look at the sailboats; these guys were big on sail boats and new most of the makes and models just by looking at them. The guy that had the Aston Martin had a 57' sailboat in Houston.

I told him I was planning on going to Boquete he replied that I must visit Volcan, the new Boquete, but much prettier. This was his third trip to Panama. He told his friends that last time he was here he almost picked up a coffee plantation in Boquete for $1.7 Million that was netting $600k a year but some Swiss investors got it first.
Sunday, November 8, 2009

I am now on a mini bus with 21 passengers on the way to David. I took a water taxi from Bocas Town to Almirentes . We are heading to David, the capital of Chiriqui, heading south over the mountains from the Atlantic Coast to the Pacific Coast. From there we catch a cab back north into the mountains and into Boquete, which was named by ???? as the best place to retire in the world.
There is very little development along the road side. Some clearing for grazing land, but mostly jungle. The roads are in excellent condition, much better than the average Michigan Road. There are guard rails on the outside of turns where there are drop-offs. The occasional house on the side of the house is a wood sided on stilts with a thatched roof.

We got to Chester's "shack" a two bedroom house in a Panamanian neighborhood. On one trip to Boquete Chester met the owner an American drug dealer, in jail. I have the feeling that the owner was incarcerated and that Chester was not. The next time Chester came into town, the man was in jail again and needed bail money. Chester bought the house from the man's wife for $20,000 in a couple of days. Chester has a man living in the house, really fixing it up, replacing the stairs, the wood trim, the windows, the floors, refinishing the walls. The man is doing a wonderful job. Chester cooked up some pork chops and chicken marinated in sour orange, sour lime, chili powder, and mayonnaise. He then enhanced the remaining marinade further and made salad dressing. As a side dish we had boiled potatoes with onions. The meet was grilled outside on the Webber using real charcoal, not briquettes.

Juan showed up. He is a Panamanian who moved to the states at age 10 and then joined the U.S. Navy. He has lived in Austin and Harlingen Texas as well as around California, in the vicinity of his naval base. Chester spoke glowing of Juan’s marketing and interpersonal skills. As I had indicated that I had no interest in sleeping on the tile floor Chester had arranged with Juan to book me at the hostel. Juan works on commission of `10%. The room was going to cost $ 15. I was thinking this was going to be a bit sleazy but I was going to head right to bed and he assured me the place was clean and safe. Mike drove Juan and me over to the hostel. Juan's keys did not work. I asked him "You just want to be on the other side of this door?" Within 30 seconds I had the door off the hinges, the lock unlocked and was putting the door back on. I did a little damage to my pocket knife. I told Juan I was from Detroit and any self respecting Detroiter could get into a house in less than 60 seconds. In the process of prying the door out, I broke the tip off my knife, but with some work on my Diamond stone I should be able to get some semblance of a tip. Had I used my chain mail piercing CRKT I would have barely chipped the edge of the blade. Juan called the husband of the owner who grudgingly got out of bed took my $15 and gave me the key to the room. The room was spacious, the sheets were clean, the mattress was very comfortable and within minutes I was asleep.



Tuesday, November 10, 2009


I awakened and went down the hall to the bathroom. Following my morning constitution I was disappointed to discover there was no toilet paper. My shower was a different than usual. I had not received a towel or any soap, but I had my shampoo and I carry a big microfiber towel in my backpack. Although it is large in area it is small in volume, it is a large backpacker's microfiber towel from REI.
Juan and I headed out for breakfast and then came back to the hostel. I indicated that I wanted to see outside the city. A part time hostel employee, part time taxi driver, Coco, indicated that he would show me around for $10. We left at 9:30 and first went to the gas station where he needed the first $10 so he could buy gasoline. Juan convinced the attendant to sell him 6 beers, which was illegal as in Boquete, the large gringo presence has insisted on alcohol rules not in place anywhere else in the country; no sales between 11 pm and 10 am. We then drove around the north of town further up the mountains. Coffee plantations were predominant but there were tomatoes, carrots, onions, and organic tomato farms. Coco knew a great deal about all of these activities. He grew up on a farm and started picking coffee when he was eight. As Coco only spoke Spanish, Juan functioned as a translator. It appears that you get 1 ?????? (bucket) of coffee per bush, 1000 bushes per hectare and a bucket sells for $2.50. His family has an 8 hectare farm and he produced 35 * 80 pounds of beans. Interesting way of expressing it. I'm guessing that that was 80 35 pound bags.


The beans are ready to pick when they are red which starts in early November. The coffee bean is the seed of a fleshy fruit. I picked one and at the fleshy portion and it wasn't bad.
Juan gives coffee plantation tours and explained the beans are first floatation sorted, the heavier beans being the more desirable. Then they are treated with some chemical that removes the flesh and the beans are then size sorted, the larger beans being more desirable. Coco indicated that some of the bushes we were looking were probably between 60 and 100 years old as could be determined by the thickness of the trunks and the appearance of the bark.

We had coco drop us off at the end of the Quetzal Trail at 11:15 Juan explained that there was a hill called "Lament Hill" by the climbers due to the length and pitch of that section of the trail. We hiked along. There was barbed wire on either side of the trail. Sometimes crops were being grown, at other times there were cows or sheep grazing on the native foliage or cleared pastures.

After about an hour of hiking we turned around and headed back into town. He had received a call that there were three pretty girls he was to meet at the bus station to take care of. We got back to town around 2:00 catching a bus for the last half the ride. Women boarded with two bouquets of flowers. I removed my camera strap and placed the camera over the seat and then put the camera in my lap behind my backpack. Bad call. We soon arrived at our destination. I put my backpack on the floor beside the door and stood up crouching to get out the door. My camera fell and landed lens first from a height of about four feet onto the asphalt. I'm sure the passengers heard some English expletives that they had not heard before as did people on the far side of town. I tried to take some pictures, it wouldn't auto focus and displayed "Err" When I tried to take a picture. I tried the other lens and it didn't complain.

We went to the bus station and soon a yellow bus stopped by the town center. I was off looking for a charger for my cell phone. Every other store in town cells the phones and the recharges (coded additional prepaid minutes) but nobody had accessories. All I needed was a mini-USB charger or cable. It was looking hopeless. Finally I found a store that had a charger but it only worked if you held the cord just so.

I went back to town square and found a grinning Juan with three Norwegian cuties. We walked back to the hostel. All three girls occupied one room for $38. I was thinking of extending an offer for the extra space in my bed, but figured I'd wait until later.

Later still Juan got another call, there were three artists coming in. He went off to the bus terminal to get them and them came back to borrow some money from me that he would repay in the morning from proceeds from his tour. It turns out they decided to go "couch surfing", sleeping on Ellen's couch in exchange for some labor or art or some such.

Chester, Walter, Mike and I went to a locals bar. The people at the bar were all laborers. I bought a round for the 6 guys at the bar. The waitress served them all without any indication as to why they were receiving an unsolicited beer. She skipped the guy sitting next to me. I pointed him out and she gave him a beer. He expressed his gratitude then told me that when we park at the house that we were doing so on his driveway. I called Chester over and introduced him to his next door neighbor.


Dinner at a very nice hamburger place and we all leched at our cute waitress while flirting with her. This was the longest hamburger dinner in history. Chester talked about his 13 year court battle with Fuddruckers, a San Antonio top end hamburger chain and Fudpuckers, his restaurants in Fort Walton and Destin Florida. If you are interested just Google "Fudpuckers Fuddruckers Lawsuit". We finished at the Boquete Inn, a boutique luxury hotel. At this time I discovered that my camera body was also toast as it produced no image.

While I had been out hiking the other three hired a retired park ranger and local Indian to show Chester 14 hectare he had bought sight unseen.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


I hitched a ride with Chester, Walter, Michael and Mundo from Boquete to David. This is both the road to Volcan and an opportunity to get my camera fixed. Maki, who runs the hostel I've been staying at for the last 3 days told me I could get my camera fixed at the store next to the Romero Supermercado in David. I was dropped off in front of AudioFoto, which had at best 2 cameras in the store. They told me the nearest place I could get my camera fixed was in San Jose, 250 miles east of here. I inquired as to the location of Romero, despite every pronunciation I could spin on that one word I was greeted only by puzzled expressions until I wrote it down.

It was across the town square. I rapidly located the Romero and entered the electronics store next door. I explained my problem as well as I could and the man looked at the camera in a very puzzled fashion and told me I could have it fixed by Sabo (Saturday). I was not feeling very assured about this but he then walked me 2 doors down to the place that actually did the repairs. I paid $15.75 which I presume is there diagnostics check out price and was told I could pick up the camera on Saturday. I am going to try to email my questions, such as getting an estimate for repair. No point in paying half the price of the body and then having no warranty.

I then walked around town trying to find a snapshot camera. One store had a good variety of cameras. I inquired as to any waterproof models. The girl had no idea what I was talking about so I wrote down "agua" with a circle and a slash. She called over a woman who immediately said that I wanted a Lumix DS1, that they didn't have any in stock but could get me one in half an hour. It took the clerk half an hour to pull up a description of the camera and a review. For $429 I was disappointed in the image quality of the sample images. This camera could be used at 2 meters for 60 seconds and sustain a 10 1.5 meter drops onto plywood. They didn't say anything about dropping it onto asphalt.

I figured I would go with a cheaper camera with better image quality. I had a delightful Lumix FS7 that broke when used out in the rain by a son. A 12 power optical zoom image stabilized 12 megapixels Lumix was $379, which I dickered down to $300 but that still didn't feel right as I was sure a similar camera at Costco is $179.

In the end I ended up buying nothing, went to a cafeteria and had spaghetti, squid stew and Greek salad for $3.50. I then caught a taxi to the bus terminal. Within 2 minutes I was on a mini bus headed for Volcan surrounded by hot little Panamanian women. I really have to learn Spanish.

I'm still on the bus with an hour to go. It's drizzling. I think I'll take a nap.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Lawyers, Guns and Money

Chester the investor came into town last night. He owns the company for which Walter works. Having made a considerable amount of money in Destin Florida, speculating in Real Estate and running a large restaurant he invested heavily in Bocas del Toro. He bought 130 acres of prime real estate on Isla de Bostimentos, disparagingly referred to as "Jurassic Park" by the residents of Bocas Town. The island has no infrastructure; there are no roads, no electricity, and no fresh water. It does however have pristine jungle teeming with wildlife and spectacular white sandy beaches on crystal clear water.

A young lawyer from Panama City and three of his friends came into town last night and rented a home that Chester has outside of Bocas Town over the water. They rounded up a full complement of women from the Peace Corp at a local bar and invited them to go with us on a boat tour the next day. We drove the shore of Isla de Cristobol.

Start with dickhead and the boat story.

The lots I saw on Cristobol were small and water front, ending in mud and mangrove. The land was flat and every lot I saw but one had at least an inch of water over 80% or more of the lot. You could bring in fill dirt, but your neighbors land was still a swamp. John (last name withheld), a retired pilot out of Destin, FL was an investor in this land. There were two houses, John's a very nice $400K structure built from ??? wood, with granite counter tops in the kitchen and built in dressers in each of the bedrooms. Cristobel is supposed swarming with ??? fleas.

We drove to Salt Creek Where Chester has a ???? in the water in front of a two acre lot. At the back of the lot is a cabina inhabited by the caretaker and his wife, the chef. Chester rents the place out for $150 a night. For this you get delivered to the house via boat from Bocas Town. The food has been purchased in advanced and delivered in a cooler and ??? comes out and cooks for you. What is there to do? Not a lot, other than enjoy the scenery from the back deck. If you bring a cell phone that works out there you could catch a water taxi to one of the surrounding islands. The beach is clean sand. The water is warm and clear, a warm breeze keeps everything near perfect.

We headed back to town showered and headed back to the house the lawyers were renting. Chester cooked a dinner of curried rice, lobster and jack fish and just hung out until midnight.



Thursday, November 5, 2009

Sombra Robinson

I went to the bank and withdrew money from the ATM. I chose "other amount" and entered $600.

The machine dispensed $500 and gave me a receipt indicating that my account was debited for $600. I was advised that I should go to the bank as soon as it opened to initiate a dispute. Without howler monkeys screaming at me at the break of dawn I sleep a bit later. I figured I would go to the pharmacy and buy an alarm clock. Walter suggested that I just buy a cell phone as it would probably cost the same.

In line behind me was a young Antillean man who engaged me in conversation. He informed me that he had a boat and could take me out if I so desired. The cost? "The cost of gas and a little money for my time." He entered his phone number into my phone and we went by the power plant to check out his boat. It seemed sea worthy, a seven meter center console glass panga.

The next day he called me and asked if I wanted to go out. I indicated that a trip to Salt Creek seemed to be in order and 1/2 an hour later he was on the dock behind my apartment. We headed over to the Marina. He pumped in 25 gallons of gas and 2 pints of oil for his outboard two stroke engine.

Sombra then told me that I needed to pay the attendant.
"Sombra, I agreed to pay for the gas we used, not to fuel your boat for the week."

"But we had an agreement."

"I only want the boat for one day, a trip to Salt Creek and back is about 6 gallons."

"You can have the boat tomorrow."

"I don't want the boat tomorrow."

"How am I going to pay for this gas?"

"I hope you are good at sucking dick... good luck."

Then I walked to the Cosmic Crab and caught a water taxi back.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Bocas Boat Trip

Click on the title to see the pictures, or scroll to bottom to see the slide show.

I was supposed to go to visit Chuck Stephen's property on the South eastern end of Isla Bastimentos.



I showed up at Janpan, his boat touring company at 10:00 as agreed. He said that he had to go tend to a stranded boat and asked if I wanted to go with him. We walked back to my apartment building and took the door next to my unit which leads to the dock outside my kitchen window. He has a 30' glass 115 Horsepower four stroke Suzuki 3 blade shuttle boat docked there.

We stopped by Janpan, picked up some gas and Manuel, my driver (I can't call them captain, sorry) from yesterday and we headed out. Eight people on a small boat transferred onto the boat I was on. Chuck took the helm of the other boat and the driver of that boat became the driver of the boat I was on. I just joined the tour.

Heather and Erika hail from Vancouver.
Martin and Dan live close to Washington D.C. either Virginia or Maryland.
Kristi and Graham also live close to Washington D.C either Virginia or Maryland whichever state Martin and Dan don't live in.

??? and ??? came from New Zealand via the U.K.

The first stop was Dolphin Bay nestled between and island and clumps of mangrove. The jellyfish were plentiful. Dolphins frequently surfaced a non playful, "Hey I'm just coming up for air."



Dolphin Bay
It was actually kind of boring as I have seen hundreds of dolphins, but my fellow boat passengers found it exciting. I tried to get them into the old pre fireworks warm up "Ohhhhhhh, Ahhhh." Erika noticed that one of the boat drivers would take off at high speed, throwing up a wake and then stop and the dolphins would jump. I convinced our driver to drive three times in a circle around the clump of boats and throw a wake. The boats in the middle rocked but nobody seemed to care as now a few dolphins breached.

Next we stopped off at a restaurant and the driver explained to Martin, the only Spanish speaking passenger what was happening. The interpretation was we were going to order food but take it with us. But that wasn't right, we were going to order food and not eat it and not take it with us. Yup they needed hours of advance notice to feed 9 people.

??? Island

We then proceeded to "Parque Nacional Marino Isla Bastimentos". Very interesting as this was on a different island. It was very small, I walked the whole perimeter in half an hour and didn't see anything much more than crystal clear blue water, pristine white sand beaches, lots of sandpipers, a few gulls and skink or gecko. When I returned to what I believed to be the starting point there was no evidence of my fellow passengers. I walked past the spot and back to where I thought we were dropped off and Janpan II was now offshore. I approached the unattended cooler on the shore, extracted my water and took a good long swig.

Picture


We then returned to the restaurant and ordered our meals, by our names and were promptly served. The fried plantain needed a little spicing up more than the tabasco like picante they had at the table so I returned to the ordering counter and struggled with "Necesito salsa muy caliente". I was handed a plastic bottle that smelled like habanero salsa. Now things were cooking. I slathered my plantain and said "now that is more like it." Marti picked up the bottle and I said "careful, that's hot." He put some on his plantain and his eyes lit up and he broke out in a mild sweat. His friend Dan, at the end of the table asked for someone to pass the salad dressing. The only thing that could pass for salad dressing on the table was vinegar and oil and it was directly in front of him. I picked up the habanero salsa and said "Do you mean this?" Martin winked at me and gave me a big grin. So, I passed it down. He doused his lettuce with it and took a bite and said "SHIT!" It wasn't that hot, he took it in stride.

Next we went snorkelling in some pretty strong current. The boat had a lot of noobs, I was the only certified diver on the boat. The snorkels were pretty gross, there were green and black life forms on the mouth pieces of some of them. After you dive down here you should really Clorox those things. The two girls from Vancouver were going to be trouble, Heather wore a life vest that didn't come close to fitting her and Kristi went out without a mask or a snorkel or a vest. Not much you can see without a mask.

I think I was the only person capable of swimming against the current to the boat. Why the boat wasn't drifting with us I don't understand, it wasn't anchored. I stuck with the Kristi as she was drifting far from the boat and had no life jacket. The others seemed like strong swimmers or had life jackets on. I told her, "just relax, you're in salt water you won't sink." Then I made her float face down with my mask on. By this time we had drifted past all the coral. I signalled for the boat to come get us, we all got aboard and agreed it was pretty cool.

Hospital Point



We took a vote on whether we should try to snorkel again at Hospital Point
and reached a consensus that would should go despite the fact that it was described as "profundo" (deep). We pulled within 15 meters of shore at Hospital point and it was awesome. You could snorkel in 2 feet of water as the water was so calm. Coral went from above the water to about 3 meters and then there was a "wall" divers parlance for an underwater cliff.

Everybody had a spectacular time at Hospital Point. This was not as dramatic as seeing sharks, morays, octupuses, barracuda, and big grouper but it was relaxing and very pretty.

About 4:30 we headed back to port, said our goodbyes and went our respective ways.

Mouse over the slide show to see the controls.

Cosmic Crab

November 1.

I went to breakfast today at the Cosmic Crab. Everybody raves about the dinner. The breakfast was quite disappointing. The tabouleh is Moroccan style, all bulgar wheat with a hint of parsley. They also had some noodle salads and some deviled eggs. The omelette was completely uninspired. They had about 8 types of pastries I didn't try.

It was quite a let down as everyone raves about their dinners.

I checked out the Gringo houses and the depressing Indian dwellings with trash all over the place.

Boat Tour

I was supposed to go to visit Chuck Stephen's property on the South eastern end of Isla Bastimentos [SHOW MAP]. I showed up at Janpan, his boat touring company at 10:00 as agreed. He said that he had to go tend to a stranded boat and asked if I wanted to go with him. We walked back to my apartment building and took the door next to my unit which leads to the dock outside my kitchen window. He has a 30' glass 150 four stroke shuttle boat docked there.

We stopped by Janpan, picked up some gas and Manuel, my driver (I can't call them captain, sorry) from yesterday and we headed out. Eight people on a small boat transferred onto the boat I was on. Chuck took the helm of the other boat and the driver of that boat became the driver of the boat I was on. I just joined the tour.

The first stop was Dolphin Bay nestled between and island and clumps of mangrove. The jellyfish were plentiful. Dolphins frequently surfaced a non playful, "Hey I'm just coming up for air." It was actually kind of boring as I have seen hundreds of dolphins, but my fellow boat passengers found it very exciting. I tried to get them into the old pre fireworks warm up "Ohhhhhhh, Ahhhh." One of the boat drivers would take off at high speed, throwing up a wake and then stop and the dolphins would jump. I convinced our driver to drive three times in a circle around the clump of boats and throw a wake. The boats in the middle rocked but nobody seemed to care as now the dolphins began to fully breach.

Next we stopped off at a restaurant and the driver explained to Martin, the only Spanish speaking passenger what was happening. The interpretation was we were going to order food but take it with us. But that wasn't right, we were going to order food and not eat it and not take it with us. Yup they needed hours of advance notice to feed 9 people.

We then proceeded to "Parque Nacional Marino Isla Bastimentos". Very interesting as this was on a different island. It was very small, I walked the whole perimeter in half an hour and didn't see anything much more than crystal clear blue water, pristine white sand beaches, lots of sandpipers, a few gulls and skink or gecko. When I returned to what I believed to be the starting point there was no evidence of my fellow passengers. I walked past the spot and back to where I thought we were dropped off and Janpan II was now offshore. I approached the unattended cooler on the shore, extracted my water and took a good long swig.

We then returned to the restaurant and ordered our meals, by our names and were promptly served. The fried plantain needed a little spicing up more than the tabasco like picante they had at the table so I returned to the ordering counter and struggled with "Necesito salsa muy caliente". I was handed a plastic bottle that smelled like habenaro salsa. Now things were cooking. I slathered my plantain and said "now that is more like it." Martin, the guy who was translating picked up the bottle and I said "careful, that's hot." He put some on his plantain and his eyes lit up and he broke out in a mild sweat. His friend Dan, at the end of the table asked for someone to pass the salad dressing. The only thing that could pass for salad dressing on the table was vinegar and oil and it was directly in front of him. I picked up the habenaro salsa and said "Do you mean this?" Martin winked at me and gave me a big grin. So, I passed it down. He doused his lettuce with it and took a bite and said "SHIT!" It wasn't that hot, he took it in stride.

Next we went snorkelling in some pretty strong current. The boat had a lot of nubes. The snorkels were pretty gross, there were green and black life forms on the mouth pieces of some of them. After you dive down here you should really clorox those things. The two girls from Vancouver were going to be trouble, one wore a life vest that didn't come close to fitting her and the other went out without a mask or a snorkel. Not much you can see without a mask.

I think I was the only person capable of swimming against the current to the boat. Why the boat wasn't drifting with us I don't understand, it wasn't anchored. I stuck with the Canadian girl who had no life jacket, the others seemed like strong swimmers or had life jackets on. I told her, "just relax, you're in salt water you won't sink." Then I made her float face down with the mask on. By this time we had drifted past all the coral. I signalled for the boat to come get us, we all got aboard and agreed it was pretty cool.

We took a vote on whether we should try to snorkel again at Hospital Point and reached a concensus that would should go despite the fact that it was described as "profundo" (deep). We pulled within 15 meters of shore at Hospital point and it was awesome. You could snorkel in 2 feet of water as the water was so calm. Coral went from above the water to about 3 meters and then there was a "wall" divers parlance for an underwater cliff.

Everybody had a spectacular time at Hospital Point. This was not as dramatic as seeing sharks, morays, octupuses, barracuda, and big grouper but it was relaxing and very pretty.

About 4:30 we headed back to port, said our goodbyes and went our respective ways.

Garden of Eden

Click on Title to see photos or scroll down to see slide show.

November 1.

This afternoon I went down to Jampan [PICS] run by Chuck Stephens and his wife Wanda. I told him I had to get off this island and related what happened last night. He knew all about it; he lives right above me. Small world. He suggested I go to the"Garden of Eden". He had a boat leaving in 10 minutes. Since I'd lost my Tilley (and yes I will moan about that until I get a replacement) I had to run off to get some sunblock. We dropped 3 people off at a nearby resort and 2 people at Red Frog Beach, We picked up a couple at that spot and took off for parts unknown. Despite having been told 3 times before we left that he was to take me to the Garden of Eden the driver had no idea where it was. We stopped off at a "Dive Hostel" a house on stilts without even a catwalk to the land. The driver asked the man who came to the dock where the Garden of Eden was. The man went to his computer looked it up on the internet, made a phone call and pointed out the directions. We took off and the driver tried to go right past the place. There was only one building around and it had a big sign that said "Garden of Eden" so I was pretty sure we found the right spot.

Three people were departing, escorted by a women. I said "Helena, I presume." To which she replied "You must be Jim. Chuck called. Those people have a flight in 1/2 an hour." Ouch. It's possible, but not likely. We walked up the hill to a combined eating area / bar / game room where I met her husband Robert. The place was immaculate. There are only three rental rooms and there are 2 house keepers, Migala and a girl who just started today Kalmia ?????.

I just sat at the bar and talked with Robert and Helena for hours, the boat wasn't coming back until 7:00. I mentioned that I liked snakes and Robert said "Migala, can you show Jim the boa constrictor?" We walked down a well kept path and in the plantain tree next to the staff housing quarters was a small boa, probably born in the spring.

We chatted about everything from building construction (Robert is a semi-retired builder), tools, moving, Bocas, guns, shooting. The most interesting was the fact that these very personable people never leave the two acre island. It's beautiful but not enough room for my restless legs. I need to get at least 3 or 4 miles of walking or 12 miles of bike riding in a day or I'll go crazy. They have people that go to David, buy the food and liquor and drinks they need for themselves and guests and deliver it all the way to the house. Robert said that he doesn't get lonely, the guests usually want to talk.

Then Woody, their pet toucan came for a visit, they showed me their red frogs which they have in a terrarium. I fed their "pet snapper". I took the table scraps down to the front dock with the two girls, stamped my feet and they all showed up. Then I emptied the bucket of vegetable scraps they had accumulated and the fish ate it up, potatoes, onions and all. Pre-stuffed snapper.

The boat came in and we said our good byes. This would be an absolutely wonderful place to stay. Just catch the water taxis to take you to Red Frog Beach or one of the many other interesting places in the vicinity when you want to stretch your legs.

I'd love to go back for a lazy afternoon chat. Let's see if I get invited.

Mouse over to display controls.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Third World Infrastructure

just called the company again because of the internet speed, should be solved by Monday or Tuesday.

How is the meat ?
Jim September 18 at 10:42am
Not bad, beats anything at the local supers. I’ve just had the sausage (chicken?) and half the tenderloin, tasty but tougher than I would have expected for a tenderloin.
Saskia September 21 at 12:23pm
Jim, could you please check the water-level in the black outside water-tank ?
That seemed to be the problem, my pump doesn’t turn on anymore.
If the water level goes too low, please let me know or open the valve so it can fill up the tank again and after we close it again.
Thanks.

I’m off to Bri Bri now and you should have 2 MB internet by tomorrow or latest the day after.
Jim September 21 at 1:19pm
I’m good for a day or two.
Saskia September 21 at 3:49pm
ok, just open the valve before the pump runs dry and then close the valve again when its full.
Oh, and BTW… tomorrow supposedly no electricity from 8 to 12:30.
Internet should be good by tomorrow, took me ages there but tonight my ICE-friend will also come and check on it.
Jim September 21 at 3:37pm
Fuck me in the ass with a stick. BTW? Well, I guess I’ll just have to walk the beach and work after dark.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Fat Man in the Bathtub

Power was out all morning. I got two hours of work in before it went out and then ran on batteries for 2 hours.
I left to get some lunch. Came back and I now have 2mb/sec internet connection.

What am I doing with this awesome speed?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkZsSydzQjM

Spotcheck Billy got down on his hands and knees
He said “Hey mama, Hey let me check your oil all right?”
She said “No, no honey, not tonight
Comeback Monday, comeback Tuesday, then I might.”
I said Juanita, my sweet Jaunita, what are you up to?
My Juanita
I said Jaunita, my sweet taquita, what are you up to?
My Juanita

Don’t want nobody who won’t dive for dimes
Don’t want no speedballs ’cause I might die tryin’
Throw me a line, throw me a line
‘Cause there’s a fat man in the bathtub with the blues
I hear you moan, I hear you moan, I hear you moan

Billy got so sad, dejected, put on his hat and start to run
Runnin’ down the street yellin’ at the top of his lungs
All I want in this life of mine is some good clean fun
All I want in this life and time is some hit and run

I said Juanita, my sweet Jaunita, what are you up to?
My Jaunita
I said Jaunita, my sweet taquita, what are you up to?
My Juanita

Put my money in your meter baby so it won’t run down
But you caught me in a squeeze play on the cheesy side of town
Throw me a dime, throw me a line
‘Cause there’s a fat man in the bathtub with the blues
I hear you moan, I hear you moan, I hear you moan

Monday, September 7, 2009

Lucy Pat

[11:15:04] Lucy_Pat: It is with a heart full of hope and trust in you that
I write you this letter to seek your help in the
context below. My name is Lucy Pat
from Republic of Sierra Leone.
Since my late father death during the war in my country i have to ran to Accra Ghana to save my dear life in the Bujumbura camp .

I am contacting you to kindly assist me locate a
lucrative business in your country into which you can
assist me invest the sum of( 3.2 United States
Dollars) left in the bank by my late father.
I was in my second year in the university in my country studying medicine before i stop because of the war.
i have decided to contact you for this assistance
after going through your profile, and i am
believing/trusting that you must surely assist
me,hence it will be of benefit to you once you
accepted to assist me.with your assistance i will offer you 15%

I will tell you more about me and also the amount i
will offer you for your kind assistance once I heard through my email address lucypat@rocketmail.com

Thanks and remain blessed as i await your positive
response.
Yours sincerely,
Lucy Pat
[11:16:15] me: 3.2 dollars won’t buy a hamburger
[11:17:02] Lucy_Pat: ok
[11:17:17] me: try 3.2 million dollars
[11:18:23] Lucy_Pat: 3.2millons dollars
[11:18:57] me: Oh well then. Is this US Dollars?
[11:19:07] Lucy_Pat: yes
[11:19:18] me: And how was this money earned?
[11:19:54] … Are you looking for dividends or appreciation?
[11:20:15] Lucy_Pat: it was earned by my late father
[11:20:42] … my late father was gold and diamond dealer
[11:21:06] me: And is currently in money market funds or certificates of deposit?
[11:21:27] Lucy_Pat: yes i have it with me
[11:21:37] … the deposit certificate
[11:23:13] me: good, I’d love to help you, please send me a check for $3,200 dollars in US Funds .1% of the amount indicated I and I can assist you in transfering the money.
[11:23:45] Lucy_Pat: how?
[11:23:57] me: how to send the check?
[11:24:00] Lucy_Pat: where do i get the money to send for u
[11:24:17] me: You have 3.2 million dollars right?
[11:24:31] Lucy_Pat: you are out of your mind
[11:24:43] … the money is in the bank
[11:24:53] … and you are telling me to send u money
[11:25:09] me: what do you want me to do?
[11:26:35] Lucy_Pat: is to help me contact the bank first
[11:27:04] me: The bank in which you have three dollars and 20 cents?
[11:27:23] Lucy_Pat: yes
[11:28:17] me: i suggest that you go to your account officer and say “Hey, I’m the rich bastard with $3.20 in your account. Take care of me right the fuck now.”
[11:28:45] Lucy_Pat: i can see u are not serioues
[11:28:57] me: You are a fucking idiot.
[11:29:54] Lucy_Pat: ok
[11:29:57] … thanks
[11:29:59] … bye

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Copy and Paste

Copy and Paste

You want fresh content? You think I have nothing better to do than blog?

Here’s a facebook thread.

Saskia wants to go to the beach….. aaaahhh… damn rain !
11 hours ago · Comment · Like / Unlike
me Not a sky in the clouds
11 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
Jim, remember the veggie and meat order today ? I’ll call you in let’s say 2 hours
11 hours ago
me
Somebody is jealous about you / us. I didn’t know if I should have come and join you guys at the club last night.
Good god woman you almost knocked me off my bike with the salutation. I left home without my machete.
11 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
jealous about ME ?? Nope… But of course you should have joined us. Thought you were too late for a date the speed you went by.
11 hours ago
Saskia
So, who’s jealous about you or me or you and me ??
10 hours ago
me
I’ll avoid the question and email you my produce and meat order. We’ll all have dinner when she comes down. In the mean time, don’t tell anybody about about the fact the I am running a home for wayward girls here.
10 hours ago · Delete
me
I need two ping pong paddles, some fur liners for handcuffs, 4′ of latex tubing, 40′ of silk ribbon,
two pulleys and a squeegee. Should I go to Bribri or Limon?
10 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
oh, so it’s somebody from YOUR part… that makes sense, haha. When she comes down… down… so, you are up on the hill an she comes down ? That makes her live where ?
And of course I won’t tell anybody anything…
10 hours ago
me
We’ll keep everything private and post it on Facebook. Discretion is important.
10 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
Ping-Pong ?? Fur-liners ? I know a good sex-shop in San Jose.. ha ha ha. San Pedro Mall… But you have to ask for permission to enter the back room. Don’t know why they brought ME there… Mrs. Innocent.
10 hours ago
Saskia
Exactly… Facebook is THE place for it… total discretion guaranteed.
10 hours ago
me
I think the black girl at the Pizzeria thinks that I am the father of your child.
She’s cute and her husband seems ok, he doesn’t speak a word of english.
10 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
Which Pizzeria ? Wow, now I have already 4 Dad’s for my child, great…
The 17 year old, the internet-technician, you and the real Dad… what about Tacho, you think he’s a candidate as well ?
10 hours ago
me
Oh god, I’ve been here less than two weeks and Tacho is cheating on me. What hell is wrong with people here?
10 hours ago · Delete
me
Which Pizzeria? First one north of here. I don’t know the name.
10 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
well, they are “life-enjoyers”… Tacho likes to share. What the heck you think happenes when I leave him alone with Yerri ? And the party is on when his wife comes down.
10 hours ago
me
You probably heard me laugh from here.
10 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
The one across the beach ? Or the one right behind the bridge before the supermarket ?
10 hours ago
Saskia
oh, that was you ? ;o)
10 hours ago
me
cheese order cheese I was hoping for camembert, roquefurt, brie and stilton
10 hours ago · Delete
me
I’ll be there in a minute.
10 hours ago · Delete
Saskia
and there comes Tacho….
9 hours agoFrom

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Costa Rican Infrastructure - Electricity

The electricity went out three times today.
8:30 – 8:32
8:35 – 9:30
19:00 – 19:01

Yesterday it went out 8:00 – 8:02

Tuesday it was out from 8:00 until 12:00

I work on my laptop, with all my code and my unit test databases on the laptop so I don’t need the internet to get work done. I have battery power for a couple of hours. The phone works when the electricity is out, so with a small UPS I could keep connected, by powering up the ADSL modem.

It was interesting watching the guys reconnect the sections, there is a bar that connects the bottom of some pineapple shaped units on two sides of a pole. Connecting the bar in the slot completes the circuit, just like those old time frankenstein electrical switches (like the main for my house). Some tico with a 40′ fiberglass pole tries to get the end of the pole into a little whole in the bar and then push it up to complete the switch. It reminds me of those tools the nuns used on the upper louvered windows. It’s actually a whole lot safer than riding up there on a bucket of a service crane, and trust me, there are not a lot of those down here.
Wiring

Don’t expect to find grounded outlets. If you find one, it probably isn’t grounded anyway.

Shower heads with 220 volt 60 amp service, with the wire connected by electrical tape are common. That kind of power could support my entire frigging house with 12 tons of cooling, 2 refrigerators, a freezer, a washer and a dryer all running at the same time. It’s highly efficient, hot water on demand. Most of the energy used in hot water heaters is wasted keeping the tank warm.

The apartment I rented in La Fortuna had a non waterproof wall fixture, the kind you would buy at a Loews for $29 mounted on the wall of the shower with the top half half and inch from the wall at the height of the shower head.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Water is Good

Water

Water is good. After analyzing the pipes and which faucets had good pressure and which ones had bad pressure I was left with the simple conclusion that the filters were clogged.. The idiot former tenants jammed plastic bags in the filters, broke them taped them up, I have no idea what they thought they were doing.

There are three filters in series, two with wound cord filters and one with chipped granite. Washing out the filters fixed everything, but I certainly understand Saskia’s statement that I shouldn’t drink the water. I might have to get it tested and put in a reverse osmosis and an activated charcoal filter for drinking water. Shlepping 20 liter bottles in from town and up the hill is not a pleasant long term prospect.

I worked my 8 – 9 straight through and quit at 3:00 went for a swim, came back, rode by ride into town, pretty mundane stuff. Now I use the outside shower when I come back from the beach so that I don’t track sand into the house. I got back ten minutes ago and now it is pouring down rain. Rain on a tin roof is awesome. I have the doors open and the wind is blowing stuff off the tables. I just love it here

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Buy Bike

I hitch hiked up to Play Negra (Black Beach) and bought a bike at the Ferreteria (No Jan, that is not a Luby’s that sells smelly little weasels). Nobody that worked there spoke english, making the transaction interesting. I believe the brand name translates to “Cheap Chinese Piece of Shit”. The tires were underinflated and the rear wheel was not positioned properly, nor was the rear mud flap. I rode to Sonya’s and got the CD (Karl I will upload today). Then I rode it home and inflated the tires. Saskia dug up some wrenches and we aligned things as well as could be accomplished.

I rode it last night to the super and bought some laundry detergent. This morning I used the washing machine, the discharge hose was not attached on the bottom so it emptied all the water onto my bathroom floor, so I guess I will mop today. Then it wouldn’t fill up again with water because the water pressure is god awful, but it is intermittent. If the load ever finishes I will put it out on the clothesline and see if it is possible to air dry clothes in this humidity.

Usually as dawn approaches I am awakened by a gradual increase in bird sounds. Today I thought a howler monkey had jumped through my open window and was howling at me from the foot of the bed. The best birding is from 5:00 to 7:00 the activity in my back yard is amazing. I have discovered that I can use Saskia’s postal box and actually get something delivered. There are no addresses or street names. I describe myself as “the second drive past the chameleon on the hill.” Nobody has a doubt where that is.

The full moon is on Friday, so perhaps I will bop up to Tortuguero, on the northern Caribbean this weekend. It’s a long boat ride down a canal to a big park. The sea turtles should be hatching in force.

Cheers, that concludes this morning’s post from the jungle.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Moving to Puerto Viejo

At 7:00 the shuttle driver shows up. One look at the expression on his face when he saw all the bags indicated that things were not going to go as smoothly as I had hoped. He spent half an hour on the phone with the somebody in one of the office. I was informed that I had been told that I could bring one large suitcase. “Really and who told me that?” Well, apparently Mr Head office didn’t have the voucher in front of him so he backed down a bit and said that they had 4 other people to bring along with their luggage and that we would not all fit. I wished him well in explaining this to the other 4 people, but this was not my problem. I said, I could have shipped these bags yesterday for 2,500 Colones apiece if I had been told that I couldn’t bring them after asked, but that it was too late now. He called back 5 minutes later and asked if I would agree to an additional $40 fee for transporting all of my bags. I agreed and off we went. My driver, Oscar, didn’t speak a word of english. We never picked anybody else up, presumably they went in another van.

Oscar pointed out the various crops, “papaya, arroz, pina, canos de azugar”. I’d seen papaya. The rice fields didn’t look anything like the paddies I expected from VC films. Pineapples are pretty distinctive. Nobody had pointed out sugar cane to me before. We had a conection point in Siquirres where my bags were placed in a van that was the exact same size as the van I had been transported in. This van already had four passengers and their luggage.

The cast, a very attractive an friendly dutch couple. I think attractive, friendly are redundant with respect to Dutch, both in my encounters with them abroad and in the Netherlands. A very pleasant looking woman with strong asian influences but nothing strong enough that I would care to guess a country, probably half asian and half european, she currently resides in Oregon. The final character was, well one glance, an American hailing from San Francisco.

After breakfast it was time to board the bus, kind of an awkward moment. The asian girl had her stuff in the front seat next to the driver and retook her spot. The dutch returned to the rear seat and the American and I looked a each other awkwardly. All the boys have very wide shoulders. You don’t want to sit next to us in coach.

I got in first, there was no way she was going to be able to fasten her seat belt and sit in the seat next to me with out leaning at 30 degree angle, but the jump seat saved the day.

Turns out she volunteered to assist the Bribri indians in counting birds. Yes this week there were going to 118 thousand species of raptor on the reservation. I said “raptor as in hawks, eagles, buzzards…” She added “and kites.” I objected “There are only about 850 species of birds in Costa Rica.” She replied that these other were just migrating. “Let me ask again did you say 118,000 species of raptors?” She pulled out her iphone and clicked around for a while and said “oh, you’re right.”

How did she get this position? There was a posting in a biological journal. Oh are you studying biology? No, I just want to help. Ahh it all became clear to me now. Who covers your expenses? “While I cover my airfare and I give them $700 to cover food and lodging.” Now, I have been to the Indian reservation. She will be eating about $2/day worth of rice,beans and other local produce, living 4 to a cabin with no air conditioning. I’m sure they would have been just as happy if she sent the money and didn’t come to do any work.

Well apparently they have to leave 2 Indians around at all times. One walks around looking really Indian and the other runs the gift shop. I never saw any other Indians while I was at the place.

No matter what we were talking about the woman from Oregon wanted to make it about her. The Dutch had picture of some monkeys they had taken in Tortuguero, she wanted us to know she had been to Bali and they have monkeys there. She worked Palau into the conversion and everybody waited for her to finish her non sequitur. The volunteer asked about how I drove down here, I told her it was a lot better with a GPS and told here were you could get software for your Garmins with really accurate information. Oregon wanted us to know that when she was in Prague….

Everybody was dropped off, I was last, as I was further south than Puerto Viejo. The van driver looked at my driveway with a “what the f..k” look on
his face. As I didn’t want to shlep my bags up the hill I decided to goad him. “I was here two weeks ago, and I drove up that in a yaris. It’s kind of tricking driving. Man those things have really low ground clearance not like this van. But if you think it is too much for you, I understand.”

Well that did it. He was going to get the van up there. It took about 8 attempts. And no, there was no way in hell I would have attempted this in a Yaris.

I went past the gate, got the key from Saskia and Jerry came with me to help with the bags. Jerry is a skinny little tico, seventeen years of age, he can’t weigh more than 90 pounds. He grabbed two duffel bags at a time and walked up the hill and placed them near the front door. These bags weigh 40 to 50 pounds apiece, the hill is steep and has no steps. I fumbled with the key and by the time I got the door unlocked and the four duffels he had brought everything but the chair, which I managed.

Home! Finally.

Check out Mi Casa

Hell it was 1:00 in the afternoon. The day was just beginning. I’ll try to catch you up tomorrow.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Moving On - Next Stop Puerto Viejo

Saturday 2008-08-29 AM

Tomorrow I am moving with my goods to my new home. Hopefully this will satisfy me for years to come. I have an occupant in my house. I pay the mortgage, the insurance, the property tax and repairs and he pays me nothing. Will somebody please buy my house.

This week’s final gonzo post.

This morning I set off too early to book transportation to Puerto Viejo. I finally found something open around 7:30. Unfortunately the girl worked for a booking company, not Interbus and couldn’t find the hotel I was staying at after I gave her a business card and pointed it out on the map. She said, “that is the bungee jump company”, no dear, but you’re close. Actually this is where my friggin’ hotel is, which is near but just past the bungee jumping place. She told me the shuttle company could not find the place, and that I should show up at the bus company with my bags. I tried to explain to here that “door to door” service does not mean the company office to my hotel.

Rather than, well any of the large number of antisocial acts that were scrolling through my head suggestions for action in bad horror film I simply told her I would be back at 8:30. At the scheduled time I went directory to the Interbus office and the entire transaction took maybe 1 minute. He wrote down “Hotel Ruth”, which is not anywhere near “ApartHotel Arenal” in name, but Ruth is the owner and I figured we were good. I confirmed “they will take all of my bags and pick up at the hotel?” He have me a big nod, a thumbs up and big “Pura Vida”
Packing

Four duffel bags, a suitcase, two back packs and a computer are packed.

Here is my sportsman GPS. Where is the belt clip? Is it packed?

Rocking chair in box? Check. Did I really walk across town with that on my head a couple of days ago?

Belt clip for GPS? Who the hell knows.

Look under the beds. Behind the bathroom drawer. Whatever, it’s either packed or gone.

Catch the bus and move on.

CNBC commentators are arguing. Do I even have a TV hookup at the new house? If I get satellite will it point straight up?

Tools, where are all of my tools? A man needs tools, wrenches, screw drivers, things that cut and grind.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Monteverde

Yesterday we headed out to Monteverde first thing in the morning, which was not exactly as early as intended. On the way we saw a bunch of signs pointing to a German Bakery, so we decided to take a peek inside. The smell of fresh bread was overwhelming, and we knew we had come to the right place; good bread is much harder to find down here than expected. We picked up four loafs of bread, two black bread, a multi-grain, and the fourth being whatever else it was that they had. Mark’s sweet tooth called out and he got a cupcake and a honey bun as well. With the bread in the bag we got back in the car and were now ready to make the rest of the trek.

A couple hours, a bunch of dirty rough roads, and two and a half loaves of bread later we had shown up to a little tourist booth just outside of town, and we booked a canopy zip-line tour, a night tour, and a hotel for the night. We went into the town to find our hotel at the Sunset Inn, and met the owner, who happened to be a German sharing the same last name as us; the natural thing to do seemed to be to share our delicious, fresh baked, German bread with him, which he gladly accepted. Pressed for time we shipped out and drove deeper into the city, but ended up getting a little lost with the lack of signs pointing towards where we needed to go, and showed up a little late, but ended up hopping onto the end with the group; if we joined the later tour we would have been late for our bus pick-up for the night tour. They started off a bit slow, but as we got further in on the tour the zips got longer, higher up, and faster. Unfortunately there was a lot of waiting in line for several of the zips, and time grew close as we were supposed to be picked up from our hotel by bus at 5:30. To our surprise they had a Tarzan swing for us to do 3 zips before the finale, which was quite the rush. We got some videos of that, which I’m sure will be put up here in some way shape or form. The last two zips were amazing, crazy fast, and so long that the end couldn’t even be seen, and we were high above the trees. While waiting in line for the very last one, the zip spanning a mighty 1km, the person in front of us began to shake and break down, wondering if there was another way that he could get back to the start, but he was able to get up the nerve and do it. For this one we had to be paired up, probably needed the weight to make it all the way to the end. We zoomed all the way back to the start, watched a couple more people come in, and got to the car to get back to the Sunset Inn to drop off our bags and get picked up by the bus. <> showed us our room, we dropped off our belongings, and were alerted that the bus was already here to pick us up, so we left and boarded. We picked up several more passengers and went on to the night tour.

The guides there recognized us from earlier at the canopy tours. We were given our flashlights and were guided through the woods. Before the tour even officially began a family of four raccoons emerged from the woods and scampered about. There was two other groups being led about so we went to the other half of the woods to get some privacy, so that all the animals wouldn’t have already been scared away. We saw oodles of insects, and learned some neat facts about them as well. My brother and I were spotting out at least half of the stuff during the tour, but we were going flashlight crazy looking for animals and insects. We learned about some trees, plants, and other animals. I was constantly on the lookout for the Kinkajou, which I learned could best be found during a night tour in the cloud forest (I had wanted to see one since my first visit to Costa Rica 12 years earlier, and since then it had become my favorite animal). There were lots of bats flying around as we looked at mostly insects, but they were interested in this strange fruit that was growing everywhere. We wandered around for a while and we came close to another group, and I thought I heard one of them mention something about a kinkajou, but I figured I had misheard. At this point the guide received a message on his walkie talkie about a “martilla” which is the Spanish name for a Kinkajou, and also the Olingo. Quickly we ran over there and I was finally able to catch a glimpse of one, he was being lazy in the tree but he was climbing around for a bit. I could have stared at him for quite a while but we had to go on with the tour, it was a while before the smile slid off of my face. Some more insects, spiders, plants, and bats later, the tour was over, and we headed into town to grab some food. We had some tipico (typical Costa Rican food) and finished it off across the street with some sushi. The waiter at the sushi bar was a different tour guide from the night walk, it seems that they just can’t get enough work! Content and happy we headed back to our lovely room at the Sunset Inn, and crashed for the night.

—————–

Monteverde

My dad woke up this morning and went for a small walk. He met up with me while I was eating my delicious breakfast and mentioned that he had encountered quite a large bird which he could not identify. After my brother ate we went to the Hanging Bridges at ???????? , the same place as the zip lines tour. It was a major disappointment after seeing everything at the bridges in La Fortuna. The only animals we encountered were butterflies, and not even many at that, perhaps it was the screaming sound of the pulleys and the literally screaming people riding them that scared them all off. The Cloud Forest was very misty, wasn’t raining most of the time but all the moisture in the air caused the trees to drip from above. Whenever we would encounter a big beautiful tree full of life, there was a zipline platform up above that I’m sure was too confusing for any animals to wish to live near. We left seeing nothing new and went back into the town and headed over towards the Cheese Factory, where they made over 150 kinds of cheeses. We ordered milk shakes, a banana split, a hamburger, and a hotdog. The hamburger tasted like a Greek gyro’s meat. The shakes and split were pretty good. We overheard a woman discussing to her friend about how she accidentally encountered her first Quetzal when searching for a Bell Bird, so we decided to ask her where she saw this in hopes of catching a Quetzal ourselves. She told us of a little forest and so we headed in that direction. Time was running short for us however as we didn’t wish to have to drive down the pothole infested dirt roads during the dark, so we only wandered around for a little bit, but still saw more wildlife in the 15 minutes we were there than the several hours at the hanging bridges. We left not seeing the bird we came in search of and decided we could quickly run through the Serpentarium before heading out, at this point it had also started to rain. We saw the snakes, lizards, and turtles, and headed back to La Fortuna. We tried to go to the German Bakery to get more black bread but the store was closed, perhaps another day. A confused bird flew in front of us as we got near to the city, cutting left, then right again, and then straight into our windshield; ironically this was right after a conversation about hunting/killing/capturing animals in Costa Rica. After a 50 millisecond moment of silence we pressed onward and eventually made it back.

We went to go for a night hike at the little park we had permission to wander through at our own leisure, but left Mark at the room as he said his stomach was bothering him and he didn’t have his contacts in. We grabbed our flashlights and headed on down the road. Managed to find the park and went in, headlight equipped, and flashlights in hand, ready to find some real wildlife for the day. About 5 minutes in a giant heron type bird burst out honking loudly right in front of our faces causing us to jump back. We didn’t see much else besides that on the walk and then decided to head back to the room to retire.

- Karl

***********************************************************************************************************

White water Rafting - Volcano - Bar Maid

We rafted the Rio Toro yesterday. We travelled about 17 kilometers in 60-70 minutes. That is a pretty good clip, a far cry from tubing down the Brazos. Normally this would be a “3 hour tour” (sing the song) but the water was up and moving fast. We have no pictures to share, I don’t think I will be buying them from the tour company as nothing is really in focus, maybe we were moving too fast for a junior photographer.

About 17:00 yesterday it started to get really clear, so we decided to go see the volcano. We drove down near the national park on the base of the volcano and there were cars and tour buses everywhere just past the river. I thought I was going to rip the bottom out of the Toyota Yaris as it bounced off the river boulders. In isolation it would have been a great observation point, but ignorant tourists were everywhere, kids were playing with flashlights, just shining them in random directions and the camera flash from wannabe photographers was rendering our eyes insensitive to the subtle changes in hue of the smoke at the top of the volcano as it started to glow like a cigarette tip.

Mark napped from 3 pm to 5 pm yesterday, Karl and I walked over every street and visited every store for 2/3 of the town. I picked up an 8 port 10/100 mb/s rj45 switch so that we could all use the internet simultaneously and a new headset for skyping.

We gave up and drop to the Arenal Observatory where for a $4 cover fee each we sat in chairs on a lovely deck way farther up the mountain and observed the volcano with people who had a clue, taking time lapsed photographs from tripods or watching through binoculars. Not a one of them thought that the flash from their cell phone would illuminate the top of the volcano that was 2 kilometers away.

I went to bed at 11:00. When I woke up at 6:00 Karl was not here. When he returned at 7:00 he reported that things were a little slow here last night so he went to the bar and was with the barmaid (a California girl) and that she wants him to be his room-mate. Then he went directly to bed. I guess the 8:30 lava trails walk is off..

***************************************************************************************************************************************

Arenal Hanging Bridges

Things got a little out of control here yesterday so we had to defer the white water rafting until tomorrow. We will be going on Rio Toro.
I guess we will head out to the waterfalls at the park after the kids get up. They were out on the town until 4:30 in the morning.

We headed out to Hanging Bridges, just west of the dam on Lake Arenal. It was a beautiful hike with many kilometers of trail on the ubiquitious concrete blocks that are used on trails and driveways in Costa Rica. These blocks have a 10 cm x 10 cm opening through which grass grows, this helps not turn the whole thing into a virtual sluice. Mammalian wildlife was varied and abundant and avian wildlife was plentiful but the area exhibited a herpetological paucity to our untrained eyes and only one reptile was spotted, a very small eyelash palm pit viper. As for primates we spotted a Howler Monkey, 2 or three troops of white faced monkies numbering in total a few dozen and a couple of spider monkeys, the squirrel monkey eluded us.

We encountered our first tapirs while we were on the first bridge. There is not a great deal of subtlety in their motion, the landscape goes into windless convulsions, though spotting them through dense foliage may be a bit more problematic. Pics



**********************************************************************************************************************

Car Swap

We drove from La Fortuna back to Liberia and swapped out the Caravan for a Toyota. The roads are very narrow here and there is no shoulder. When an 18 wheeler or a bus comes around a turn 2 feet into your lane, there is nowhere to go. Besides it was a gas hog. At 550 Colones per Liter and 5.5 kilometers per Liter I was burning about $60/day in gas and running a high carbon foot print.

I needed better internet connectivity than could be had from the Internet Cafe. I found a place that allows me unlimited number of connections with some pretty good throughput for $10 / day, with my own coffee maker and a place to store my bags. It also has a kitchenette, living room, bedroom with 2 queen sized beds, good air, nice location right on the edge of town, maid service and laundry service.

The feeder hose to the kitchen sink broke this morning during my morning coffee. Triage! Two notebook computers and 2 cell phones were on the floor connected to chargers. 4 duffel bags, 2 suit cases, a computer case were thrown on the beds. Rudy, the landlady’s boyfriend quickly shut off the water but we were an inch deep in water through the whole apartment. The hose had snapped off just where it joined the 1/2″ FIP fitting. Rudy went off and bought a similar replacement line and it kept leaking. I told him he had the wrong type of supply line but he had a hard time believing me because he bought the same kind that had been on there. As the supply was 1/2″ PVC MIP the zinc FIP with washer was never going to do the job. We walked down to the ferreteria (hardware store not a ferret restaurant) and I walked behind the counter and found a nylon supply line. I told him this would work if he hasn’t already damaged the thread on the PVC by over tightening. He had. So for now there is a bucket there, I told him to go off and get a hacksaw, a shutoff valve a 1/2 PVC to 1/2 MIP adaptor, some solvent and glue and we would have it fixed in half an hour.

It is now 10:30 I’ve been dicking with this for about 3 hours, it is time to go out and book a white water rafting trip for tomorrow

**********************************************************************************************************************************************

Arenal

We arrived in La Fortuna yesterday, we are staying at Arenal Lodge on the side of one ofMount Arenal.


The volcano had been dormant since October 1922 prior to a VEI=2 eruption in 1968.[2] The eruption wiped out the town of Arenal and killed 87 people.[3] It lasted for several days, and during that time destroyed crops, property, livestock, and forests. Fifteen square kilometers were buried and the explosion affected over 232 square kilometers. It has been active almost continuously since the eruption.

Pics from last night.

It is 8:50 in the morning with a heavy drizzle so I think I will take a pass on the butterfly tour.